4 months old!

Eli is now 4 months old! He has changed SO much since he was born, and it is so fun to see him grow and develop! We went to the doctor yesterday, and he weighed 18 lbs, 12 ounces putting him in the 98th percentile. He is 25 inches tall so only in the 57% percentile for height. We may have a wrestler on our hands. ;-)
Eli's newest favorite thing is standing. He loves to push himself up and stand while he holds onto helpful fingers. It's amazing how strong he's getting. He also really loves all his toys! He loves to play with them, throw them down, and suck on them. He chews on everything, our fingers included, and drools like a leaky faucet. He's started wearing bibs half the time. ;-)
He also got a new Excercizer that he stands up in outside that he loves. He will play with the toys that are attached and gently rock the entire Excerizer back and forth. I have a feeling that once he starts to crawl we might have a hard time catching him. He loves to move.
One of the cutest things he's started to do is to laugh! ;-) It's so fun throughout the day to try and get him to laugh by making funny noises or tickling sounds. He loves farting noises. ;-)
He has his first cold right now, which is super sad, and I really hope he recovers soon. He still can't stand driving places and only can stand his stroller for about 20 min. before he starts to whine. He either wants to be free on the ground or in someone's arms. One of our lifelines has been his carriers. I'm wearing him right now, and he fell asleep. He loves to cuddle close to us, and it allows the fam to be able to go to Sea World and the OC swap meet without so much as a fuss.
Eli is such a good boy, and we are so proud of him. He sits in his high chair during meals, and he brings huge smiles to our faces every day. I'm SO thankful to be his mom!

14 weeks

So I haven't written in the blog in a million years, but I am so enjoying life with our little man. I spend so much amazing and precious time with him every day that I don't know what else to write about besides him, our new little bugger. So I figured that I would write about him from his perspective. Thanks, Sarah, for the idea. ;-)

So here's what Eli would say. If he could talk. ;-)
So, now I'm 14 weeks old. I'm getting pretty big. When my mom weighed me a few days ago, I was already 17.8 pounds. I'm wearing clothes for 3-6 month old and am in a size 3 diaper.
My mom always tells me what an amazing sleeper I am so I guess it's impressive. My mom even says I'm a better sleeper than her. I'd say it's what I'm best at besides smiling and eating. Every night I go to sleep in my crib around 9 PM. Then I usually wake up for some early morning breakfast around 4 or 5 am, but most mornings I don't want to wake up quite yet and will fall asleep again for another hour or two. But that's not enough sleep for me. I will then usually take 2- 2 hour naps during the day. During the day, I like sleeping in my swing. I love my swing and my rain music that I listen to so that I can sleep better. I still love being swaddled, but this past few weeks I've taken a lot of naps without my swaddle and my mom has started keeping one of my arms outside of my swaddle so that I can learn to sleep through the night without it.
I love my life because every day we get to do my favorite things. My very favorite thing is spending time with my mom and dad. I love it when they hold me and carry me around and help me to dance and sit up. I love to smile for them and talk to them and have even laughed a few times. My other favorite things to do are playing in my jungle, playing with all my fun toys and putting them in my mouth, and going on walks with my mom.
I don't like driving in the car very much, but I guess I'm starting to get used to it. I can't wait until I can finally crawl! I move my arms and legs around all day, but I haven't been able to move except to roll over.
Until next time. Eli ;-)

How he Loves Us!

Today has been a big day of realizing things. I'm not sure why. I think it's because Joe left for the night. Whenever that happens, I'm hit head on with one of my biggest weaknesses, fear. I have been afraid of the dark and being alone for as long as I can remember. Joe is always telling me: all you have to do is choose not to be afraid or all you have to do is choose to have a good attitude or to choose make today the best day ever. Joe is an amazing guy, and he has the best attitude and he's so amazing for me but sometimes those things are really hard to do. But I tried tonight for him. And for some reason, tonight it worked.
God doesn't want me to live in fear and even though my imagination is super vivid and when I look out into a dark night I can imagine things being there (have u ever read my book, My Darkness?) it doesn't mean that there aren't ways to overcome those fears.
I believe are culture is very inundated with violence, and it's part of my problem. The movies we watch, the TV shoes, the books, the news... there are so many things out there screaming death and destruction. It is easy sometimes to believe that when u are alone at night something awful could seriously happen to u.
But tonight I was really hit with this song. Please watch it. It's real. I really, really like real. There are too many phony things out there. Too many things and people that are trying to look their best for everyone else. I'm very guilty of this at times too.
Tonight I learned somethings even if it wasn't the first time: I want to be real for everyone. I want to be a friend. I want to be unafraid of what man can do to me. I want to be all that God wants me to be. Still learning, still striving.
Here's the links:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0luHiWwi08&feature=related

Eli

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God's holding me

Eli's 6 and half weeks old. He's growing up in every single way. His little legs are starting to take on some serious chunk, his length is starting to keep him from wearing some of his smaller onesies, and he is starting to really enjoying playing with me during the day. I sing to him, read to him, rock him, bounce him, carry him around, take him on walks, and more.

However, each evening he has a hard time. I think that the little guy is experiencing so many new things all the time, that he has to have himself a little cry when the day is done. Joe and I work hard at soothing him, and most of the time we are successful.

It's hard work. We change tactics all the time until we land upon something that pleases him that evening. We are definitely problem solvers with this little guy.

Last night as I was rocking and hugging little Eli, and he continued to kick his feet, squirm his little body, and make fussy noises. I asked Joe why Eli looked so stressed. I said that Eli has everything he needs. We make sure he is well-fed, has clean clothes, a clean diaper, plenty of things to look at, and warm arms to hold him. He really doesn't have anything to be stressed about.

Joe turned to me and said that what I'd just said was a perfect illustration for why we shouldn't be worried and stressed either. God is our heavenly Father, and he makes sure, as the Scriptures say, that we have our needs met. He holds us and feeds us and loves us in the same way that we hold, love, and feed Eli.

It was a wonderful reminder. God is our Father, and He loves us, hard to imagine, infinitely more than I could ever love my precious, little son. WOW!!

^{Matthew 6: 25}"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? ²⁶Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? ²⁷Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life^{b]" style="font-size: 0.75em; line-height: 0.5em; ">[b]}?

²⁸"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. ²⁹Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. ³⁰If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? ³¹So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' ³²For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. ³³But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. ³⁴Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?

I think worrying comes natural to a new parent. It has definitely been a daily struggle for me not to worry, and a challenging spiritual exercise to continually throw my worries about my precious, new little man at God's feet. He's so dependent on me. He cannot eat, change himself, raise his head, travel anywhere without my help. It's hard not to worry about doing the right thing. There are so many decisions. Every day is a new adventure, and I adamantly want to do the right thing. But I don't want to be a worrier. Studying the Scriptures I don't think it's ever what God wants for us so how not to worry.

Daily, no that's not right, hourly surrender.

It has been and continues to be my favorite word. Surrender. So incredibly vital to a healthy walk with Jesus. And so vitally important as I venture forward, boldly, in my first year as a mom.

Lord, help me. ;-)

Eli and sleep

Life with a newborn is never dull. I think it's because that regardless of the fact that my life consists of an endless cycle of feeding, changing, playing with, and trying to help Eli fall asleep, my mind is constantly working, constantly pondering what is it I could do to help Eli be the best he can be, namely in the area of sleep.

Eli has a hard time going to sleep. He revels in the warm comfort of a heartbeat and has a very difficult time falling to sleep if his ear isn't nestled against mine. ;-) I love my cuddlebug, but this does make certain activities in life very challenging: making dinner, cleaning, going anywhere, taking a shower, moving at all. Therefore, my mind is constantly working on ways throughout the day and things that I can do to help the little guy sleep so that his times of being awake are filled with happy grins and not discontented cries.

I love my little guy so much and have been told by my mom on several occasions that I had a hard time sleeping and don't that beat all, I still do. ;-) So hopefully Eli's light sleeping and need to be sleeping in someone's arms isn't a long term indicator of his future success as a sleeper, BUT he's also got his father's genes and praise the Lord, Joe is an amazingly gifted sleeper. ;-)