Last night I watched the movie Seven Pounds. It really hit me. I had heart surgery when I was seven. After it happened, I believed God had spared me from death. For years after I sought to make every day count. It became my mantra. Carpe Diem- Seize the Day! Do your very best! Give your all! Blessed to be a blessing! It's hard to keep up that point of view for sixteen years. Watching that movie last night brought me back. I cried like a baby.
God has granted me a gift, my life, and I desire it to be a sacrifice. In ways I'm like the main character who is so guilt driven, and sometimes it's exhausting. But then again sacrifice is difficult, life wasn't meant to be taken lightly or lived solely for pleasure. We are designed to make a difference, to love God and to love others, to give our lives for something worthy of the great sacrifice that was given so that we could live in every sense of the word. I am so thankful that unlike the main character in that movie I have someone bigger than myself to lean on. Considering this, I still don't know what I would do if I was in his shoes. If I believed I had caused the death of 7 people, one being the person closest to my heart, I believe I too would feel forced to atone myself. Even though I know there's forgiveness through Christ, it would be so difficult to forgive myself. I know in things far less significant I have had a difficult time letting go. I am often the one with the biggest judge's mallet to my head, reminding myself of my guilt.
Can you think of things you've been given that you don't deserve? Do you ever take them for granted? Are there any areas in your life where you need to grant yourself forgiveness?
1 comment:
That's really great, and true.
Thanks for sharing.
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